Everything sucks, and I dont know what to do anymore, I seriously feel suicidal. Someone please help me.?

I'm 14 and was diagnosed with depression and anxiety about a month ago and was prescribe Paxil. I took it for about 2 weeks and started to feel like a zombie. I'm slowly weening off of it now, and now my depression is coming back.. Everything just sucks and everything around me just bothers me so much idk how to explain it... Everything is just so empty and dull and lifeless to me and I feel so detatched from the world. My intrusive thoughts torment me, and I really don't want to live like this anymore and have been thinking about suicide for about a month now... I don't know what to do anymore